


Why Did You Do That?

by Pixiemixieheart



Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: Feelings, Fluff and Angst, I Love You, M rating just to be safe, M/M, Oneshot, Prompt Fic, not really smut but there is light sexual mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-08
Updated: 2015-10-08
Packaged: 2018-04-25 10:47:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4957378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pixiemixieheart/pseuds/Pixiemixieheart
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gift fic for @sinandcakeinorlais from Tumblr who won my 100 follower Giveaway who asked for some angsty, romantic Fenders.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Why Did You Do That?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sinandcakeinorlais](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinandcakeinorlais/gifts).



> Hope this is what you wanted @sinandcakeinorlais! 
> 
> Thank you sooooo much for taking part in my giveaway! *hugs* Hope you enjoy it :D 
> 
> Full prompt in the notes at the end.
> 
> Oh also the whole kissing being more intimate than sex credit goes to six lily petals! She is so awesome and I am grateful she even talks to me to be honest :D

He should have known better than to stay. It was foolish to think that they could have a conversation without it turning into an argument. Justice had warned him of course. But Anders being Anders refused to listen.

The evening had started typically enough, except for one detail. Instead of having wicked grace night at the Hanged man, they had instead held it at Fenris’ mansion. Anders was surprised he’d even been invited to be honest, Fenris hate of him being abundantly clear. 

Oh Sure, they’d fucked a couple of times, and Maker’s Breath it had been fantastic. But Anders was under no illusion that it was anything other than lust that drove them to it. There were no pretty words or soft caresses between them. Just good, rough, mind-blowing sex.  

They were not friends, and even in sex it was pointless to pretend otherwise. They didn’t talk, they didn’t kiss on the mouth, that was not who they were. All they were to each other was a means to release tension and satiate their base needs.  

Anders flush up against the wall or face down on a bed as Fenris rammed into him from behind. _That_ was what they were to each other.  When they were done, they would dress and leave without a word. It was the perfect arrangement for both of them.

 _Why_ In the Maker’s name, Anders thought that changing their routine was a good idea, he’d never know.

The rest of their companions had left hours ago. They’d fucked as usual, and as usual it had been fantastic. But then Anders got....sentimental? All he knew was that he didn’t want to leave yet.

And so he’d asked Fenris if he could stay for a while, to which the elf had agreed. (Probably more out of shock than anything else, in truth.)

That led them to this moment.

This moment where they were looking daggers at each other and Anders could practically feel the venom coming out of Fenris’ pores.

“That demon has addled your mind, Mage.” Fenris spat as he glanced at Anders who stood next to his bed, dressing.

“My mind? MY MIND?! It’s you that can’t think logically, _Elf_!” Anders said as he hastily pulled up his breeches. “There is no reasoning with you! I don’t know why I even thought...Nevermind.”

“Your kind are _dangerous_. Every Mage needs to be watched. We have killed countless maleficar that prove this without a doubt. Yet you continue to insist that Circles should be abolished. Who will stop the Mages from becoming abominations if not for the Templars?”Fenris spat as he strapped on his breastplate.

“I never said Mages don’t have the potential to be dangerous! YOU have the potential to be dangerous. But you don’t hear me saying that you need to be caged to protect the populace and treated like a fucking pariah simply for being born!” Anders slipped his robe over his head, perhaps a little too forcefully, and ripped one of the seams. “Ugh.”

_Stupid, infuriating, hypocritical elf..._

“It is not me that demons seek to possess. That falls to you and yours. ”

“Oh, don’t give me that nugshit. We both know you are capable of being more deadly than a possessed Mage ever could be.” Anders stood there, his feathered coat in his hands staring at the elf in disbelief. “Even after...You’re one hypocritical son of a bitch you know that? You spew hate for Mages every chance you get and yet you’re _Fucking_ one! You tell me that Mages should be confined to the circles and yet you follow Hawke and protect her from the Templars with a vengeance that rivals even Justice’s. And THEN... “ Anders laughed mirthlessly “As if that isn’t hypocritical enough, you say magic spoils everything it touches whilst you benefit from it more than anyone of us! Silently accepting it whenever I heal you in battle!”

Fenris stalked towards Anders glowing blue, brandings alight as he grabbed the healer’s robes in his fist and pulled him towards him roughly, covering Anders mouth with his own. Anders eyes widened when he felt Fenris’ tongue lick across his bottom lip seeking entry.

Fenris had never kissed him before. Truthfully Anders thought the elf would never consent to kiss a filthy mage. Sex was sex. It could be intimate or it could not. But kissing....kissing was always intimate.

Without Anders consent, his lips parted and Fenris’ tongue slipped in. Teasing, tasting, their tongues met and retreated only to meet once more.

Fenris released the Mage’s robes and wrapped one arm around Anders waist, the other thread through strawberry blonde hair as the elf deepened the kiss. Anders melt into his arms, returning the kiss with as much enthusiasm and passion as Fenris poured into it.

Sweet Maker!  how Ander’s had wanted this. How he’d longed to taste Fenris and share his breath as their lips...

_What? No! This is not...is it?...NO!_

Anders pulled away, taking two steps back.

“What...Why did you do that?” Anders swallowed thickly. “You...Why?”

Fenris was breathing heavily, emerald eyes looking right at the Mage.

“You called me a hypocrite. If I am to be a hypocrite, I may as well do what I wish.” Fenris said taking a step closer.

“You...You’re not making any sense.” Anders heart beat so hard he was sure Fenris could hear it.

“No. It does not make sense. I should hate you. I should want to rip your heart from your chest and crush it in my fist. I should want for the Templars to find you.”Anders gulped and took in a staggered breath. Fenris tone softened. “I should _not_ want to touch you and for you to touch me back. I should _not_ find pleasure in seeing you smile and laugh. I should _not_ want to be the cause for why the smile is on your lips...”

Fenris took the last step forwards and raised his hand to cup Anders cheek, a lyrium etched thumb caressing over the Mages lips.

“I should not _want_ more...But I do.” Fenris said softly and Anders swore he saw something in the elf’s eyes he’d never seen before. Vulnerability, hope.

“Wh-what are you saying, Fenris?” Anders whispered.

“What I’m saying. _Fool, mage._ ” Fenris smiled fondly. “Is that I love you.”

Anders blinked.

“Come again?” Anders asked, because he was sure he did not hear that properly.

“I love you, Anders.” Fenris said as he wrapped an arm around Anders waist, bringing the other mage closer.

_No...No...this is a joke...He..._

“But you hate me. You can’t hate _and_ love me. That’s...It’s just...I have to go.” Anders stepped away from Fenris for the second time that night.

This was all wrong.

This is not what they were. They were not soft and tender...Fenris did not love him. It was a joke...some sort of trap, maybe. Yes, that was it.  Just like Ralph back in the Circle. Fenris wanted Anders to say things that he would regret...feel emotions that he had buried for years so that the elf could later use them against the Mage.

“Anders?” Fenris tried to hold Anders hand but the Mage ripped his hand back as if burned. “Don’t...”

Before Fenris could finish the sentence,  Anders was already running down the stairs and out of the Mansion into the streets of Hightown.

He ran and ran, not stopping until he stood before the door to his clinic.  Anders unlocked the door and stepped in, reaching behind himself for his staff when...

“Fucking bollocks!” He cursed when he realised that he’d forgotten his staff back at the Mansion.

\--------------------------------------------

It was four days before Anders found the courage to return for his staff. Actually, it really wasn’t courage so much as cowardly timing. Varric had told him that Hawke had left for the Bone Pit that morning, taking Fenris with him. So the Mansion was supposed to be empty.

Four days of trying to convince himself that he did not return the elf’s feelings. Four days of convincing himself the he’d been right to run. Four days of absolute torture for nothing. It was useless to deny it now.

Anders loved him.

Fenris bore his soul to Anders and the Mage rewarded what must have undoubtedly been one of the hardest things the warrior had ever done, with rejection.

Anders was a coward and a fool. 

And now it was too late. There was no way Fenris would even consider taking him back. No way Fenris would accept Anders apology even if the human came to the elf on his knees. It was all ruined and it was _his_ fault.

Anders heart ached in the knowledge that his fear had destroyed the one chance he’d ever have with Fenris.

With a sigh, he opened the Mansion door (that Fenris never locked.)  He climbed the stairs to the second floor and opened Fenris’ room.

It was empty, as he knew it would be.

Anders walked in and made his way to the corner where he always left his staff.

It wasn’t there.

“Maker, Dammit!” He said to himself as he realised that Fenris must have got rid of it in his anger.

Anders didn’t blame him. Maker knew that was the least that he deserved.

“Looking for this, Mage?”

Anders spun around and saw Fenris standing just behind, holding Anders staff and wearing nothing but black leather breeches, the smell of wine on his breath.

“Andraste’s Flaming Butcheeks, Fenris! You scared me.” Anders said with a gasp. “What are you doing here?”

_Fucking Varric... I am going to kill that dwarf._

Fenris raised an eyebrow.

“I live here. And it is not my fault you are remarkably unaware of your surroundings. It is no wonder you were always found.”

Anders chuckled, more out of nerves than anything else.

“Okay. I deserved that.” Anders said as Fenris handed him the staff.

“So now that you have what you came for, will you run again? Or are you finally willing to talk to me?” Fenris asked.

Anders blinked.

“You still want to talk to me?” He asked, confused.

“Why would I not? I understand the urge to run better than most. Were our situations reversed I cannot tell you with certainty that I would not have reacted the same.” Fenris lowered his eyes momentarily, looking away. “But I am tired of running. If you do not return my feelings, tell me now and I will never mention it again. “Fenris looked up directly into Anders eyes. “But if there is a chance that you may feel the same for me as I do for you, then I ask you to _please_ not run from me again.”

Anders smiled.

Relief, happiness...emotions that he didn’t even have a name for filled his entire body. Anders couldn’t believe how lucky he was as he gazed upon the beautiful elf in front of him. He’d almost messed this up once, he wasn’t about to do it a second time.

“I’m sorry I ran. I didn’t understand, I thought...I thought it was a trick. It wouldn’t be the first time that happened. There was a Templar in the tower when I was sixteen...It doesn’t matter now.” Anders shook his head and dropped his staff on the floor with a clatter.

He rushed at Fenris, embracing the elf with a strength he didn’t know he had.

“I love you, Fen.”

Fenris arms felt so good as they wrapped around the Mage’s back and pulled them closer. Fenris tasted like divinity itself as the elf kissed his Mage with a softness and tenderness that Anders would never have believed the warrior had in him.

That night they made love, face to face, gazing into each other’s eyes. Their movements languid and slow, worshiping every inch of each other’s bodies as they climbed together toward their inevitable climax. And as they lay wrapped up together afterwards (Fenris fast asleep against Anders’ back), the Mage knew that no matter what happened, this was exactly where he was meant to be.

This was _right_.

Sure, there were things that they needed to work out. Things they disagreed on...but they loved each other. For now, that was enough.

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> How about some angsty, romantic Fenders. Anders and Fenris are in the middle of a huge argument(about mages, of course). Fenris has reached his breaking point, on the verge of screaming in rage. He grabs Anders and kisses him, and in his own little brooding way, he tells Anders he loves him for the very first time. Surprise me with Anders’ reaction. ;0)
> 
> Thank you for reading!


End file.
